Was supposed to be something else but is now a b’day post

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No No… This isn’t a nostalgic b’day post. I received a mail from the b’day calendar wishing me on my b’day and it said am turning 32. Umm… what? I was preparing for 31. Damn it… that is like a whole year gone. 32 sounds new and shiny but there is no excitement to it. It doesn’t have the same hype as 30… or 35 or 40….. Even 31 is about dealing with your 30s… what is 32? It isn’t even mid way to 35.

32- What are you going to bring me? All I want is to reconnect with all my old friends because I cannot seem to find the same kind of comfort, understanding and fun with the new ones.

Old friends – Those who have known me for 10 years or more.

I have managed to reconnect with quite a few already- for better or worse.

But what is life if we don’t go back and make the same mistakes again?

Trust the same people who have broken it already?

There is nothing more comforting than that. Specially when you are growing older… so no matter how old in age, your intellect, wisdom will always be young. So young that history could repeat itself all over again. And it is more fun than new drama in your life. Because this is drama you have relived in your head, practiced what you are going to say over the years… you are prepared to deal with it.

This is not what I wanted to write about but now I can’t seem to stop.

32 … 32… 32… I say it over and over again to get used to it. It feels…. unfamiliar… strange… I am going to have to practice saying it.

Here is to another year… which will bring nothing… where nothing much will change… but will be celebrated anyway … just for being there.

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