Ideally I should be writing this post sitting in a coffee shop with a view. But I live in Gurgaon and as much as I love the city, I haven’t come across one with a view. My trusted Choko La at Galleria has shut down. The only view it had was when there was a table next to the glass but that was shifted away years back. Every morning I wake up remembering the hot chocolate and it makes me want to cry. And I don’t want to travel all the way to Delhi looking for a view. But then again, I don’t even drink coffee. So, yeah… this post cannot be a happy one in any case.
And am sorry for one more unhappy post. Recently I have been in touch with quite a few women even though KC thinks I don’t have any female friends. And everyone has a story. We are all dealing with certain shit in our lives… it’s not something we talk about online… it’s not stuff you will see on our facebook or blogs or twitter or anywhere. Basically, life sucks. And more and more these days I wonder… what is the point? Is this it? Is this why we wanted to ‘grow up’? Is that all there is to it? Has everything been worth it?
I also wonder about wrong and right… umm, who came up with these distinctions. What if wrong is actually right and vice versa. When I became an adult I learned to try and live my life in the ‘right’ zone and avoid the ‘wrong’. But as I grow older am more inclined towards grays. Human beings cannot be compartmentalized. Human beings cannot be consistent. Human beings have double standards. I wish it wasn’t so and we could all live our lives like robots. Unfortunately, it doesn’t happen that way. Life is fucking complicated. I wish I could say we make decisions keeping pros and cons in mind. That’s not true. We do what we feel like, when we feel like it without thinking about the consequences. That’s the truth. And nobody should feel guilty about it. If I could turn back time I would like to fuck my life all over again. Maybe not in the exact same way because that would be boring but I would like to make mistakes all over again. None of this- being the perfect human being shit for me. I like myself because of the imperfections. My imperfections distinguish me from the crowd.
Please stop judging people’s life by their facebook feed. Facebook is a place where everything is whitewashed. Everyone- every single person is dealing with their crap. Stop deleting your profile because you do not fit into the whole successful career, marriage, baby wala zone. STOP. Life is more than that. It takes guts to have a life which is more than that. Facebook is like the Indian junta… it is difficult to be yourself there just like it is in real life. But please make the effort. Don’t quit. Stand up and fight. Or don’t… because it’s facebook and not worth it.
I love my female friends… more than my male friends. Because females are open… you know what’s going on in their lives in a few conversations Vs men. Male friends may go through shit but will not talk about it. Atleast that has been my experience. They may listen but they will not talk about their lives. So, yeah. I love women. A lot. And I think the world is a fucking great place because of women. I’d rather die than live in a planet full of men. Even if they are hot, 6 pack abs, fitness (not body building) wale guys. Women rock my world. Women make workplaces a better place too. I love working with women. It’s so nice to have a woman in the team.
One big change in our generation is that unlike our parents, we want it all. We don’t want to compromise. I think that’s so great. Even though we may doubt ourselves because there is no precedent to this. Even though we have a whole bunch of relatives trying to pull our morale down. Even though we don’t have any of it figured out. It’s a great change.
Ummm… this was supposed to be an unhappy post but I have a distinct feeling… it’s not. Oh, whatever. Like I said, I don’t have anything figured out and now I don’t even care.
Cheers to all the mistakes am about to make and fuck up my life in absolute unique ways… or fuck it up with the same old mistakes. I refuse to give a fuck.