There are 2 times in a year when I wonder whether marriage was the biggest mistake of my life.
But rest of the year, I think ‘Shit, can anyone else be more perfect for me?’
No. This is not a sappy post. I don’t do sappy. I do sarcasm which I like to call ‘funny’. This is as romantic as it gets.
KC and me comparing who has the worst set of fb friends.
Me : This female wished her hubby on fb a ‘Happy 1 month of marriage’
Him : This female got a passport for her kid and has put up the pic of the passport and the pic of the pic on passport on fb
Me : You win
Since a female has stopped putting pics of her new born baby every month to show how much he has grown, I have nothing exciting happening on my wall anymore.
I am watching ‘Secretary’ in the bedroom while KC is watching the India Vs SA match in the living room. He barges in just as a spanking scene is starting
Him : Sheee… you are watching porn
Me : Shoo…. let me watch. And it’s not porn
Him : Hey… wait… I have seen this scene
Me : Just the scene? Not the movie? Such a pervert. Am sure you have googled ‘erotic scenes in Hollywood, Bollywood and South Indian movies’ No wonder you have seen every ‘erotic’ scene that exists
KC is now following me on twitter which is a pain because I have to be careful about the hubby related jokes. I am this close to blocking him out.
On Maha Shivaratri I read something on twitter about how it’s a day to feed snakes some milk.
So I sent some twitter milk to my 18 year old friends ‘Saap Association’ who are studying for their boards right now. I was careful enough to write ‘twitter milk’ because I have made enough jokes on ‘milk’ as a perverted teenager who grew up with other perverts.
‘Apparently, today is the day to feed milk to ya guys. Here’s some twitter milk… yenjoy!!! Slurp! Slurp!’
Now I am the butt of KC’s jokes on how I am such a pervert and don’t even spare 18 year olds. Sigh!!!
To block him or not to block him on twitter.
KC comes home. I had asked him to ask the guard when the water is supposed to come since a pipe burst and there was no water at home.
Me : Yaay… paani aa gaya.
Him : Yes, I know. I read it on twitter
I have to come up with separate conversation material now.