Love thyself

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Hiya… I have been gone long… really long. No, I was not busy… atleast not last week. No, I was not out of town or stressed… atleast not last week. I don’t know why I didn’t post. I did have things to say but could not bring myself to type. I cannot even call it writer’s block.

Anyway, I am back…
  • Monday evening/night was great. I had the greatest time dancing. I have had a love hate relationship with dance. I was loved to dance as a kid… I would perform in school, at weddings, participate in competitions. The affair came to an end when a friend in school remarked that I don’t look good when I dance. Don’t ask me why. I was taken aback. I stopped dancing. Now when I think back it was not the remark but the fact that I was entering my teens and felt awkward in my body. I could only let go on the dance floor after a few drinks at B-school parties (never touched liqour before that). When I joined the Jazz class 3 years back I didn’t enjoy it one bit but went anyway since it was some timepass on the weekend. I felt uncomfortable and didn’t even stick around for 3 months. This time I had no intention of learning to dance. It was something extra to do… a hobby, also an activity to help me keep fit or even lose weight. Nothing more… For 3 months, I felt awkward. Our instructors always tell the new students that for 3 months we will look like chimpanzees and its ok. It is only in the 4th month that things change. So true. We were made to do exercises like- looking at our self in the mirror and saying “I love you”. No kidding. It was so silly at first. Now I understand the importance. We were made to Jazz walk (something like Cat walk) in class. Now I can walk with confidence and look at myself in the mirror. I have come a long way. On Monday, the seniormost instructor- P had taken class… she is damn good. Our regular instructor- S was out of town. Before leaving, she told me that I performed really, really well. I am actually moving my body and should stand in front instead of middle. Everyone clapped for me. It is a long, long, long way for someone who did not want to learn dance and could not imagine enjoying it. I love the dance classes… I can let go… the music does amazing things to my body. I don’t know why but my regular instructor- S has never appreciated me even once. Its kinda disappointing.
  • Watched Dirty Picture… It was pathetic. There was no heart, the dialogues were just dialogues… Vidya has not acted.. she has just spoken dialogues… I didn’t understand it… I don’t understand the character… one moment, she was ok with her sexuality and flaunting and next moment she was craving society’s acceptance. Only Nasseruddin Shah was tolerable… the others were horrible.
  • Watched Puss in Boots… loved it. The 3D was superb. This is what it should be like. I hate it when the movie is 2D with 3D thrown in… I have to keep removing the glasses and putting them on. So bugging. KC didn’t enjoy it too much but I liked it. Worth a watch.
  • It is appraisals week and it makes me tense. I know whats done is done… but yet. I finished off my team’s appraisals yesterday and I hope it has been fair. Now, I am waiting for mine. My career decisions for next year will depend on this appraisal. I am a little de-motivated right now. Last 2 days have been exhausting. Thank god, the week is almost over.
  • KC has been unwell. It is weird living with an ill person…. it is quite frustrating when someone insists on going to work and refuses to go to the doctor when ill. Finally, he took the day off yesterday and we visited a doctor.
  • Money problems are looming over our head this month… LIC is screwing with us… the long waits at the phone calls… stupid processes… so many demand notes… oof!!! Frustrating!! Dealing with all of this on the week days is tiring.
  • I cooked schezwan fried rice and noodles on Sunday. Its quite simple… same cooking method has to be used for both. For schezwan I added the ready made sauce available in the market. It was quite good.
Catch you over the weekend!!!

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