Life as me….

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  • You spend 30 mins talking to a guy at the gym whose name you do not remember. In fact, you don’t know the names of all the people you interact with at the gym regularly and now it is too late to ask.
  • You bump into someone you used to work with, a few months after quitting the company but cannot recall his name.
  • You bump into an ex-batchmate whose phone number you have but cannot recall his name and hide your phone so you can save the number all over again under “Cannot remember name”
  • All your favourite people are experts at sarcasm
  • You introduce an acquaintance as “ex- best friend’s ex-boyfriend” and they haven’t dated in 17 years
  • You have 2 separate phones- personal and professional because you sent a sms bitching about a senior to him instead of then- boyfriend. Both phones now have separate phone books.
  • Nobody was happier than you when friends couldn’t attend your wedding. It means no obligations to attend theirs
  • You hate wearing clothes and yet have too many
  •  You are not allowed near any glass, fragile, expensive objects because of clumsiness
  • You cannot get through even one day without a list telling you what is the plan for the day
  • You start anything “new” by making a list
  • You have a different friend to suit every mood and none of them share/read/care about motivational messages
  • You think you are funny
  • The best compliment you have received is “You are funny”. Yes, given by yourself because nobody else appreciates the sense of humour
  • According to you- a superhero/heroine is someone who has abs
  • You wait for the day you have abs so you can block all the unfit motherfuckers out of your life; until then… let’s stay friends *Kidding. Please don’t leave me*
  • You are constantly calling out men for their sexism and now it is a habit. Yes, even at work.
  • You love working with women because the opportunity does not come very often
  • You hate answering the phone. Can telecos just ban phone calls? WhatsApp helps improve writing skills
  • You hate spam with a vengeance and everything has a filter- phone, email, blog, facebook.
  • Every detail of your life is planned else you cannot sleep at night- except for career, finances, loans, family related issues etc etc.
  • The best thing that happened to you recently is- twitter
  • You cannot respect people who eat desserts as meals. But are courteous enough to never say “Should you really be eating THAT? Are you sure?” Not yet, anyway
  • All objects of “social symbol” are utilities for you. A car transports you from one place to another, a watch tells you time, a purse holds all your junk, glares protect you from the sun, clothes enhance your attractiveness etc etc.
  • You’d rather stay home with a movie or a documentary than meet people to listen to their uninteresting stories.

And now am bored talking about myself. Ciao.

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