Last place I was comfortably introverted

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The last place on this planet where I wasn’t judged for my introversion was my school. It still amazes me on how much alone time I could get in a place where everyone was cooped up in 4 walls. Of course, those 4 walls extended to a huge amount of space and consisted of – a huge playground, skating rink, school for the younger kids, school for older kids, an area for recreation, a slope for entering and exiting, library, so many classrooms, a grotto, chapel, huge area to play kho kho, a graveyard (not kidding. You could jump over a low wall and enter it), another playground for younger kids. AND for boarders there were various dormitories, study room, refectories (for meals).

I wasn’t the only one, most of the girls would spend time on their own and it wasn’t weird. You could study alone or in groups. Just walk alone or in a group. Read alone or in groups.

The problem started once I left school. I was thrown into the world of extroverts. My mother comes from a family of extroverts (mainly) who are loud, love to gossip and celebrate all festivals together. This was a far cry from her current nuclear family which included an introverted husband and 3 weird kids who just wanted to stay home.

Anyway, I have spent all my life since school apologizing , justifying or rebelling for my basic nature. I need alone time. I need to come back home and read. When am forced to party till late night, it unnerves me because the conversation adds no value to my life. I keep wishing I’d stayed home instead and read. I don’t want to do this ALL THE TIME but there has to be a balance.

Reading ‘Introvert Power’ is making me realize how much I have been trying to justify and apologize for who I am.

Running has been a BIG help. It is a time I spend with myself, thinking random stuff. So, when I have to justify WHY I run alone, it seems unfair.

More ranting coming up as I read the book.


One thought on “Last place I was comfortably introverted

  1. May be because Kids are busy in their world. As we start growing up we start looking around and paying attention. For some reason most of us start being conscious – not just about our-self but about the world around us. We start expecting same things from everyone that is being typically expected of us. I guess we will be the same after 50-60 yrs of age. So you still have more hope of getting less bothered by people in future 😉

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