What is with early mornings and me? We have become the best of friends lately.
Sometimes we live in our heads… the hurt, the pain, the thoughts, feelings… they are all in our head. Of course, there is an external force or trigger but that trigger has no idea about the effect.
Like for yesterday, I was upset about something someone said. And I kept snapping at KC ‘coz he was doing everything at the last moment before flying to Dubai and putting me under more stress. Sometimes I think what if that is the last thing I say to him before something tragic happens…and then I cannot breathe. Anyway, I told myself this is who I am and not everyone will like/understand that. In fact, most people won’t. And that makes my life harder but I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Certain incidents/experiences in life are watershed moments. They may define your entire life but people around you may not even be aware of its significance. The whole point of it to know yourself better… to make you who you are and you appreciate the people who are with you. And if I had to turn back time and go back to who I was 10 years back I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t ever turn back time or change how things turned out. Because then I wouldn’t be who I am today.
And then sometimes you realize what you knew in your head was always true even though people around didn’t admit it. And it leaves a bad after taste because it means the world is a sad little place with sadder people. So, hold onto what you have tight and thank your stars… and hope and pray it stays that day.
Adios people… am off to Haider and to have a serious talk with a friend who seems to be drifting away.