Hiya. Its been a busy week. Any week where I have to go to Faridabad and Noida/Ghaziabad is hectic. I have not had a moment to breathe. Also, the Sunday dance classes just add to the stress. I do enjoy them but it does get tiring and I like my Sundays free.
- Arranged marriage: 2 of my friends have started looking out for partners through arranged marriage route since their own search has been unsuccessful. In a way, arranged marriage is a convenient thing in India. It is not looked down upon. What about people in the USA? They have to find their own partners. What they cannot find anyone and want to get married? Anyway, these friends are educated, broad minded people but when it comes to arranged marriage- the rules remain the same. A grounded, good looking girl who is well educated and has a career but is not ambitious to pursue it strongly. Also, someone who can cook and will “blend” with the family. Everything is skewed towards the males. Can a female have “cooking” as a desirable trait in her partner? Naah… people will laugh at her. She is only supposed to compromise. Totally unfair. KC and me were discussing. I think the whole concept of a female moving in with the guy and taking his surname is very old fashioned. Can she ask her guy to move in with her parents? No, right? And why not? Are her parents not important? The whole concept worked when women were not working and males had to support wife, kids and parents. That does not apply anymore. Of course, KC did not want to argue or agree with me. Men!!!
- Last month when I met my cousin, she told me she had quit her job. I was shocked. Even though we are in 2012 (when the world is supposed to end), my family does not consider financial independence of the female to be important. Strange since there have been many incidences where arranged marriage has led to fatal consequences. This cousin- lets call her L, was one of the few females in the family who was working. She had completed her engineering in a reputed college of Mumbai and joined a reputed company. Her parents are looking out for a groom and decided that she should stay home and lose weight instead. I was sickened by the whole thing. Of course, my arguments were shot down by my mom who thought anything is better than giving girls so much independence that they marry against parents’ wishes. Argument over. Case closed. If things have not progressed for my family, what about the majority of the population? Will females ever get their due?
- Met a friend last month. We had discussions on variety of topics. I had forgotten how much fun that can be. One of the topics discussed was fidelity or infidelity. We decided that a person does not cheat because he/she is dissatisfied by the other partner. It is always because of lack of something in the person and not the relationship. There are people who cheat and there are others who do not. It is a matter of character and will power. Anything else is an excuse. No, I am not moralizing. This is an opinion of someone who has been there. I am quite familiar with my dark sides. I think it is quite important to make mistakes so that you realize their consequences. Life is all about experimenting. There is a time to play with fire and a time to play safe. I have played with fire and have moved to the safe side.
- I want to feel warm- if only for 5 minutes. Last weekend, there was sunshine and it was barely cold. I was so happy. I thought winter is over. Monday began with fog and rain. What is worse than cold? It is cold+rain. I just want to be warm… and nothing makes me warm enough. And I want to feel the sun. I miss the sun.