What is a best friend?
How does a friend move into the best friend category?
Are there special requirements that a friend needs to fulfill before he/she can be considered a best friend?
Are there any boxes that need to be ticked?
Are there any agni parikshas that one needs to undergo?
Sure, the comfort level is the highest with best friends. Why is it so? Is it about time? Then, why aren’t any of my school friends my best friends?
Here is what I think (sorry for the listicle, I know it is too buzzfeed-like but that’s just me):
- Best friends are those who can complete my sentences and thoughts. They can cut through all my bullshit and get to the gist of me
- The comfort level is the highest, not because I have spent more time with them or connected from the first moment. Instead, it is because we have had conflicts and know how far I can push him/her. Both of us have gone through ups and downs and still managed to hold on.
- I can rely on them. No matter what. They aren’t people I call everytime am down but I think of them when am drowning. They may not answer my phone when they are busy but will definitely call back as soon as they can spare a minute.
- I can spend 12 hours with them without getting bored or feeling uncomfortable with the silence. Conversation flows easily and we don’t need to make plans to kill time
- They are not judgmental, no matter what I do. But when a line is being crossed, they will be the first ones to point it out.
- I can pinpoint crucial moments of my life when these friends have stood by me. Those moments took them one step ahead of all my other friends. They were there when nobody else was.
I don’t go around telling people I care about them or saying ‘I love you’. Fawning over someone (social media does not count) does not come easily to me. Because when I do say it, it is a point of no return. I am giving someone the power to destroy me and hoping they don’t use it. When best friends walk out or betray or hurt me, it takes years to come to terms with it and forgiving is out of the question. When, if, it ends, there is no question of trying to retrieve what’s lost.
Above all, my best friends are consistent and reliable. I can jump over a cliff blindfolded and know they won’t let me fall. It’s a steep expectation but there are people who meet it. Blame them for the high standards, not me.